One Step At A Time

This photo represents how I try to view each day: I can only experience each part of my day as I reach it, one step at a time. I can start my day by looking at what's immediately in front of it, and so react to it accordingly. I am aware that the rest of the day stretches ahead of me, but I can't experience it and know what will be until I reach it.
One Step At A Time.
There is movement around me, there is a flow, a current; but I choose to take things One Step At A Time. I can look ahead, but not cannot reach it without taking those steps, first. Each step will feel different to the last. A different perspective, a different feel to it. A different moment. I can look behind and see the steps I have made, and although they may matter, they are no longer important in this very moment.
In other words, when I wake up in the morning, I deliberately stop myself from dwelling on the day ahead. It just makes me forget to live in the moment - that first satisfying yawn and stretch after waking, listening to the sounds outside my window, the noise of the outside world, mixed with the sounds of me: my breathing, my voice, my rumbling, empty tummy; my children laughing and chatting. The light straining through the curtains, the feel of the bedclothes, the warmth I am surrounded by. These things and more make me feel so grateful for the day ahead - whatever it may bring. Why spoil the moment by bringing in the stuff to come several hours away - be it good or something to stress about - when I could just enjoy those first precious moments of a new day? Being mindful of each step - from brushing my teeth (I feel so grateful to have healthy teeth, a toothbrush, toothpaste and fresh, clean water), eating my breakfast (delicious toast and tea, tasty fruit), chatting with my children (admiring their growing brains, personality and the unconditional love we have for each other), and so on - experiencing each step to its fullest potential, and enjoying myself, is a key to feeling happy, connected, and contented in my life.
Believe me when I say I have bad days - don't we all? But taking those steps to get from one end to the other when experienced as fully as possible, in connection with ourselves, with others, and with our environment makes everything more of an experience. And if we can try to weave in some gratitude for ourselves and others, and share in the fullest joy for the great stuff that happens to ourselves and others in our day, isn't that worth getting up for?

Meditating Play

I love these big bowl swings. I find my inner child coming out to play whenever I'm near one: there's nothing like sitting in the swing, and the feeling of swaying back and forth through the air. Today we went to the park for a play, and opportunistically, I gave a guided meditation.
Being comfortable, lying in the swing, and being aware of the feeling of the pull of the earth as the swing sways back and forth. The body being pulled down and up as the swing moves. Breathing easily and slowly, in time to the sway. Closing the eyes, to really experience the feelings of movement; and that barely perceptable pause before the swing moves in the opposite direction. Each sway is a moment in time. Experience that present moment, before it's gone and replaced by the next. Like a clock ticking: tick...tock...
Each moment is different to the next. Each sway is slightly slower, slightly shorter. A fraction of time slower. As the swing continues swaying, so the present is ever changing, so the moment is different. Focusing on each moment. Each sway leaves a greater feeling of calm, of peace. Relaxing into the seat. A constant change. A constant movement, whilst the body stays still, the mind is quiet. Feeling the body react to each sway, slowing down...slower...slower...almost still. Quietly resting, a tiny movement in the swing. Calm, slow breaths, calm, quiet mind. Peace. Being held in the air, supported by the swing as it gently moves in the breeze. Quietly resting in body and mind, feeling calm and peaceful. Happy.

Mindful students

Today I have been doing mindful activities with students at both Swanage Primary and The Swanage School.

This morning I met with reception children. We did a range of activities, from imagining blowing up balloons and watching as they floated away, eating strawberries mindfully, to lying down for a beach meditation. It was really interesting to hear their thoughts about what they were eating. They used each of their senses to engage completely in the process, which came to them happily and naturally, without any awkwardness. They talked about how the strawberry had started off as a seed, explained to each other how the seed grew and that there was no such thing as a strawberry tree, and how the rain and the sunshine had helped the strawberry to grow.

When they chose a strawberry to eat, I asked them to feel the texture, weight and shape. Then they used their sense of smell to identify what sort of aroma they picked out ("sweet-smelling"), before licking it, which they found most amusing! Next, rather than taking a big bite out of the strawberry, I asked them to take a tiny nibble and let the flavours move around the taste buds, so that they could identify any different flavours ("tangy", "bubbly"). I asked them to close their eyes to find out if the flavour changed ("stronger").
They all enjoyed this activity. I wondered if they would have been as happy to try doing the same with a piece of food they didn't like or had never tasted, before. Perhaps that's one for another day!

We moved on to some quiet time for a beach meditation. I was taught not to expect young children to lie still, but to allow them to move and wriggle around if they needed to. I was happy for them to do this, although it does feel a bit counter-intuitive! However, despite the wriggling and the fact that most of them kept their eyes open (not a problem) they did lie quietly. We visualised a special pebble which each of them put in their pocket, and then they got up and did a bit of grounding exercise before heading off to lunch. With an extra strawberry as a treat, of course! I thoroughly enjoyed working alongside the children, and felt privileged to do so.

This afternoon I did some mindfulness work with older students. This time it wasn't bread-making, but working with "Zentangle". I asked the students to come up with an intention before they started, and to think about their intentions as they doodled.

It was quite a challenge for them I think, but that's good. My intention for the session was for them to do something that would take a lot of patience and to persist, even if they found it difficult. To realise it doesn't matter about the mistakes, but to carry on regardless of whether it is "perfect" or not. I am sure they were proud of their efforts!

If you would like to book me for some sessions at your school, please get in touch at innerspaceproject1@gmail.com

Solstice

Here in the northern hemisphere, we are celebrating midsummer's day. It has been a beautiful day, with the sun blessing us with its warmth and energy. I have been busy for most of the day, rather than making the most of the lovely weather, but I have been reflecting on my life, looking back at the months since the winter solstice.
The photo above was taken at 10.30pm, just as dusk gave way to the creeping darkness as it slowly swept the sky clear of any remaining light. I went for a walk, and came across several bats as they began their nightly routine. The air was warm with a light breeze, and there were aromas of heady evening floral scents. I finished on the beach, and went for a paddle. The water was cool and refreshing, the waves were quiet and gentle. Just what was needed for me, this evening.

Thinking back to the winter solstice, my new year's resolution was to stand out of my comfort zone. I think I have achieved this - although there is room for a lot more shuffling! Personally, I have gone beyond my comfortable limits frequently since January this year, and don't intend to stop, now. Today I decided to add in a new intention for each week until the winter solstice, in order to continue to grow and evolve.

But for now, happy midsummer's day, or if you are in the southern hemisphere, happy midwinter's day!

Baking Bread - mindfully

Yesterday, I went to The Swanage School, where I did some mindfulness work with two students. I taught them to make bread.

For me, making bread is full of symbolism and meaning. It is a process of transition and constant change. It involves constant attention, requires physical strength, and needs endless patience in order for the bread to evolve and "bloom".

The students I was with yesterday began by feeling fairly unsure of what they were about to do. Neither of them were really sure about what was going to be involved, but they got stuck in, anyway. As they began to mix the flour and yeast mixture together with their hands, I could see they were getting into it. They wanted to succeed, even though they had some doubts about their ability. Neither of them had ever made bread, before. I asked the students to really focus on the sensations, and use their senses to fully appreciate their efforts. Thoughts and feelings were expressed throughout. :)

As they left their trays of dough to prove in the lunchtime sunlight beaming through the windows, I saw how the students cared about their work. They wanted their efforts to succeed. When they returned 45 minutes later to enormous balls of dough, they were amazed. Then came the bit they had been waiting for: beating the air out of their dough. Taking out their frustrations, before moulding it into the shape they wanted their loaves to be, before placing back on the windowsill to rise.

When they returned later to collect their huge golden loaves from the food-tech room, full of the delicious aroma of freshly-baked bread which had just come out of the oven, they couldn't believe their eyes! The expressions on their faces were of pride, amazement, and happiness. They had gone through the whole process from start to finish using mindfulness, and achieved something wonderful out of it, at the end.

Achieving something wonderful in mindfulness or meditation terms, can take any physical form, but using mindfulness in our activities also brings about an inner form, in the shape of happiness, calm, pride, satisfaction, or more besides. But it also creates the moment of just being. Being present in each moment and fully experiencing what our bodies and our minds are creating: a sense of inner peace.

Cast Light On Your Shadows

Last summer, whilst out running in the woods, I headed towards a path I tend to feel wary of. It was a gloriously warm summer morning, and as I ran along the sunlit-dappled path, I became mindful of looking out for Adders. Now I used to be terrified of snakes as a child; and even as an adult, I’m really not that fond of them. 

Despite my fear and dislike, I have never seen a snake anywhere other than behind a plate of glass at the zoo: a sanitised, safe environment – perhaps not so much for my benefit – as for the snakes themselves.

I reflected upon this as I left the woods and entered an open space, that the fear I have of meeting a snake on my own well-travelled path, has little basis. Why must I place the emotion of fear into a situation I have never encountered, and may never face? Surely it would be better to experience the fear and react accordingly if need be?

As much as I love being amongst woodland, I do tend to run a bit faster in the areas where I am likely to encounter an Adder. This might knock a couple of seconds off my time, but if I run too fast, I may miss the beauty all around me - even that of the adder itself.

To confront a fear allows us to learn something deeper about ourselves. If we permit the fear to control our decisions on, say, which paths to take in our life, we restrict our choices, and may inhibit our own growth. Although it might feel easier to avoid anything scary or unknown in order to protect and preserve – to sanitise – our comfort zones, these seemingly easy decisions can prevent us from learning more about ourselves, and forming a deeper connection within.

By facing our fears, we can begin to open up to what it is that has influenced our decisions and perceptions. If we fully experience our fear, we can then see the beauty of our deeper selves, learn as we conquer our fear, and evolve on a spiritual level.

So look for your own strength and courage in your heart, and allow the light within you to be the sun dappling upon your path less travelled. 

Enjoy The Moment

How often do you hear your children asking for a mobile phone/tablet/new trainers or other highly-desired items? 

How do you respond? Do you ever ask them to consider why they feel they "need" it, or to consider the difference between a want and a need? It could stem from a need to fit in with their peers, to be liked, and to be accepted by others, which are all vital to our sense of self. So if you are feeling the pressure but feel that they are too young or not yet able to take responsibility for these status symbols, how do you teach them to understand?

Each time I feel that my children are asking for something they don't need but want, in order to fulfil their sense of self, I remind them of an analogy I developed with them: see your life as being like a big, best quality chocolate bar, wrapped in shiny paper. 

You carefully take off the layer and look at the beautiful, complete bar of chocolate. Then you decide how you would like to eat it. 

Which would be better: to pick up the chocolate, bite into it and eat the whole lot, and then feel full, sick, and sad that it is all gone? 

Or enjoy a small square at a time, savouring each mouthful, experiencing it piece by piece and happily admiring the taste, smell, feel and sight? 

So do you want everything right now - to consume what you have - and then get to a point where you are left wanting more? 

Or would you like to enjoy your life piece by piece, moment by moment, taking in the scenery, sights, emotions, experiences and the beauty of life, savouring each moment and evolving into the person you are?

Live in the moment, and enjoy each and every day!

Photo:Nikki Harman - Chocolate from Chococo, Swanage